Calmness in Your Life

It has been a crazy week, need lots of calming regimens.
STRESS!! Well, here is what I found today to answer those needs !! Keep in mind it is not for the weak at heart!!


By following simple advise heard on the Dr.Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished. So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished (and there were lots)
and before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Tequila, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how freakin good I feel right now!!! Tee Hee!!





Just kiddin :)

Taser Gun--Rated PG

Ok, so I got this in an e-mail. Sounds like a Bubba story to me!! A perfect gift guys for your wife!!

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversay submitted this:

Last weekend I saw something =2 0 at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife, Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety...??

WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.

I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. NOTHING!

I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs. AWESOME!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, RIGHT????

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul)while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh and blood moving target.

I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie(for a fraction of a second)and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But,if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of short and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand , and taser in another.

The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a 2 second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a 3 second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than 3 second would be wasting the batteries. All the while I'm looking at this device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple A batteries) thinking to myself, 'no possible way'!

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do by best...? I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, 'don't do it dipsh--,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one second burst just for the heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed
the button, and ...HOLY MOTHER OF GOD...

WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION...WHAT THE HEL-!!!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs?

The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a taser, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three second burst would be considered conservative?

S-O-B, that hurt like HE--!!!

A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on
the mantel of the fireplace. The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. My triceps, right thigh and both nupples were still twitching.

My face felt like it had been shot up with Novacain, and my bottom lip weighted 88lbs. I had no control over the drooling. Apparently I pooped myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone. I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair. I'm still looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!!

P.S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!!!

Black-eyed Pea Cornbread

Come on now you southern girls and give this one a try. I got it from my sister-in-law. It was a huge success with my family. This is almost a meal on its own. It is YUM-YUM.

Ingredients: 1lb pork sausage
1 onion, chopped
1 1/2 cups cornmeal
1 tsp salt
2 eggs, slightly beaten
1 cup buttermilk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 can cream style corn
1 can black-eyed peas (use the jalapeno black-eyed peas)
2 cups grated cheddar cheese
2 jalapeno peppers, chopped (optional-I used the kind in a jar)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 13x9x2 inch baking pan. Cook sausage and onion in a large skillet until sausage crumbles and browned. Drain and set aside. Combine cornmeal and salt in a large bowl. In another bowl, beat eggs then add buttermilk and oil. Combine the dry and wet ingredients stirring until moistened. Stir in sausage and remaining ingredients. Pour into prepared dish. Bake at 350 for 50-55 mins or until knife inserted in center comes out clean. Serves 8-12.

UGH,OH!!! I just lost my picture of the cooked cornbread, maybe I can find it and post it again...leave it to me to screw something up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


TIP: to break-up the sausage after it is cooks use this little gadget. As the sausage cooks in the skillet with the onion, gently "rock it back and forth" in the sausage. Works like a charm.

Revenge...

Aww, 'tis sweet. I know the Bible says vengence belongs to the Lord...but just can't help it sometimes.HA! Yes, it's 2am , lying in bed can't sleep and bloggin in my brain. This has really gotten out of control.

Let me tell you this, never, but never should you "snicker" about a woman's hair. Well, my hair has been in an awkward stage, not short, nor long, but long enough to pull up into a "little ponytail". Ok so, Pappy decides he is going to comment on it, calling me Bambi. HA!!! actually meaning "Pebbles" HA!! So you know he doesn't know his cartoons very well.
I went out shopping one day and purchased a little hair-piece thus making the little pony-tail more presentable. When I got home of course I put it on. Pappy never noticed the difference. He was watching TV and playing games on his laptop...still never noticing...a "devilish thought just ran through my head" TEE HEE!!!!! I told him I was going to bed, then walking behind his chair (playing like I was going into another room) I ever so gently removed the hair piece and just dropped it onto his lap!! OMG!! the reaction was priceless!!He just sat there moving his feet and legs back and forth just trying to get that hairy ball monster that had dropped on him out of his lap. I was rollin on the floor laughing. He looked like Fred Flintstone trying to drive that car with the feet moving!!!. The best part was repeating this story to my sister in law. She laughed so hard she was crying...
Moral of the story...Don't mess with the woman's hair!! :)

Nose-ring Monster

Have I created a monster?? I think I have, just in time for Halloweenie!!

Everyday she says, "have you blogged today?", "when are you bloggin again?" "you know it's been 5 days since you blogged"!! ok, ok, enough already.

I've only been bloggin about 2 months, so I thought what a great idea to have my sister-in-law to join in the fun!!! Mmmm Can we say things are getting out of hand? Ok, so she starts her blog on Monday, just 3 days ago and now she is SUPER STAR!! Come on now give me a freakin break! It obviously takes me longer to express myself!!HA!! or maybe her life is a little more interesting than mine. Oh Yeah, that's right she is married to my little brother!!! No joke, she is hilarious. She can tell the funniest stories. Sometimes I feel when we are together we are "Lucy and Ethel" reincarnate. Ok, so I've got to get back to work now. I will try to do better in the future....

Blue Lucky Duck Punch

this is a great "blue" punch for a "boy" baby shower
It must have been good because it didn't last long! Sorry the picture is not any better.


Blue Lucky Duck Punch

1 (0.13 oz) pkg blueberry flavored Kool-Aid
1 (2 liter)bottle Ginger-Ale or lemon-lime drink
1 (64 oz) bottle white cranberry juice or white grape juice
8-10 scoops vanilla ice cream
3/4 to 1 cup white sugar, to taste
3-5 new, clean mini rubber duckies

Stir the sugar and Kool-Aid with about 2 cups of ginger-ale to melt before adding to punch bowl. Once melted add all ingredients to punch bowl and gently stir, leaving the ice cream last. Add the duckies....and enjoy!

Hot Wheels!

brrumm,brrumm,brrumm,...hot ride...hot wheels...pimp ride...just cruisin... this was given to Luke and Prentiss by Uncle Jamie and Auntie Kim....check out the occupant!! This is Chopper, chocolate mini dach! He thinks he is ALL THAT AND A BAG OF CHIPS, KING OF THE MOUNTAIN!!! He thinks this is his ride. HA! HA! Can't you tell he is neglected!! HA!! NOT!!!! In the near future, he will abruptly tumble from that mountain and be replaced by Luke and Prentiss... get ready, Granny YaYa here we come!!! This is a SERIOUS RIDE. You almost need commercial license to drive!!!!!! Look out painted walls and door facing!!!

Baby Shower

Ok, so I thought this week would be slower....not! The baby shower was a great success. The "come and go" is absolutely the way to go. It solved parking issues and also allowed people the liberty to leave when they wanted without feeling they had to stay for the entire time. There was a constant flow of people for 3 hrs. "Little Mama" got some great gifts. She is so excited it "rubs off" on you. Check out the pictures. Did you notice the blue punch? The punch was a new recipe. It is called Lucky Duck Punch. Blue punch with white clouds and yellow duckies. It tasted great and "disappeared" quickly. Recipe will follow later.

Chicken cuttin and values

The previous blog was a recipe using a whole chicken. Most people now adays don't cut up their own chicken, for whatever reason. Some don't want to take the time, liking the convience of pre-cut. I don't mind cutting up a whole chicken though. When I was around 10-12 years old my dad taught me how to dissect those "yard birds". He taught me how to "ever-so-carefully" handle, thus respecting a sharp knife. Now, I can cut up that chicken in no time. I also remember when I was about 5 years old he taught me how to wash dishes. (No dishwasher machines back then)!! I stood on the chair to reach the sink so that I could wash them. He said, "now, wash them clean the first time cause I will be checking them and if they are not clean you will wash them again". HA!! Needless to say, I washed them clean the first time. Now-a-days "people" would say that was "child abuse"...HA!! NO!! that was just teaching me responsibilty. My dad loved me very much and taught me how to be a responsible adult, productive in my profession, love and respect GOD. I think my brother and I turned out to be strong, GOD fearing, hard working adults. Too bad this kind of childrearing has fallen to the wayside and thought of today as child abuse. I thank God everyday I had parents that valued GOD, love of country, great work ethics, and instilled those values in their children. My dad is no longer with me. He has been in heaven for 20 yrs. I miss him everyday. I will forever be greatful for GREAT PARENTS. I love you MOM>

Garlic Chicken with White Wine Sauce

When I found this recipe, I thought OMG way too much garlic. Not!!! It really is fantastic. My daughter in law (older son's wife...not "little mama") anyway...she doesn't like garlic but she loved this. Trust me, just try it. I know you will like it.

Ingredients:
1 4 lb whole chicken, cut into eight parts
salt and freshly ground pepper
2-3 whole heads of garlic, cloves separated(40 cloves)but not peeled.
Olive oil
1 1/4 c. dry white wine, such as Sauvignon Blanc
3 large sprigs of fresh tarragon (I used dried)
3 large sprigs of fresh thyme.

Method:
Lightly smash the garlic cloves with the side of knife, just enough to break the cloves. Leave peel on.

Trim the chicken pieces of excess fat. Pat them dry and sprinkle pieces generously with salt and pepper. Heat 3 TBSP olive oil in a dutch oven. Brown the chicken pieces on all sides. Remove from pan when browned.

Add garlic and saute until golden brown, about 4 mins. Add the wine and the herbs. Bring to a boil. Add the chicken pieces. Reduce the heat to medium low. Cover the pan, simmer until the chicken is cooked through.

Season to taste with salt and pepper. Transfer the chicken pieces to a platter, spoon garlic sauce over the chicken.

Serve alone ( for low carbohydrate option) or with rice, noodles, baked or mashed potatoes.

Serves 4-6.

Yummy, Yummy

Love You Forever

What's up with the books? you might ask. I love books and always enjoyed reading to my boys (that is when I could get them to be still long enough) HA!! Today I was reading one of my favorite blogs, pamperingbeki.blogspot.com, she mentions a new childrens book...I LOVE YOU MORE and immediately thought about this book, LOVE YOU FOREVER by Robert Munsch. This book was given to me by cousin about 10 years ago. It is a moving story of how a little boy goes throught the stages of childhood and becomes a man.
A young woman holds her newborn son and looks at him lovingly. Softly she sings to him:
I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.
It is also about the enduring nature of parents' love and how it crosses generations.
I enjoyed this book so much I have bought it for my "adult" children and also like to include in "baby gifts". Be prepared, read this with a box of tissue.

Curious George readings

Bet a smile just ran across your face! Seeing this cute little fellow brought back more memories...taking "big brother" to school my younger son and I would go to the local library and sit on the little kiddie loungers and read stories of "Adventures of Curious George". Remember the yellow hat, the bright yummy bananas, red balloons... Who isn't smitten by this little inquisitive fellow who always seems to get into one scrap after another. I just had a thought!! Maybe my younger son was influenced by "little George's" behavior because he sure was a challenge to his "mama". HA!! (one of those uh-ha moments) HA!! A little late, don't you think???? Well, guess what....YaYa has already started getting ready to teach the twins by reading the same little books to them....(back to what goes around comes around) HA!!! can you tell I am having fun with this little saying??? HA!! tee-heee

Blessed Beyond Measure

My sister-in-law...what can I say? She is the best! However,...here it comes. She LOVES to scare people. There must be something seriously lacking somewhere for this unquenchable
desire to "scare the pants off" anyone that appears unknowing and innocent of her "great past time". When you least expect it
she is there to abruptly bring you back to reality. All in all, she is truly like a sister to me. We have had many laughs together and shared many tears through the years.

SISTER-IN-LAW

Fate smiled upon me
the day you became my sister-in-law.
From the very beginning
I felt "at home" in your presence...
and I knew in my heart
that the two of us would grow closer
through the years.
Now, as I look back in time.
I am reminded
of just how much we have shared,
and I am grateful
that I was blessed
with a sister-in-law
whose warmth, thoughtfulness,
and sense of compassion,
served to make my days brighter,
my sorrows more bearable,
and my life richer in so many ways.
for this-- I feel
fortunate beyond measure.
by Genie's Poetry

(how did she read my mind?)
P.S. This is the motorcycle rider's wife!!

Rats runnin

ok,ok--I know I'm behind on important matters such as my blog..so here goes...

Wow, this week has been sooo busy. I feel like one of those little rats running on a wheel!HA!! I have been slackin on my bloggin or so my "followers" tell me. It has been like running a race and someone keeps moving the finish line. I feel like a dog waggin his tongue to keep up!! HA!!! But hey, as I understand it won't get any better with the arrival of twin grandsons. Today I took my mom and aunt on a all day outing. While out and about I saw two sets of twins. The first set was 3 month old girls. They were so cute with pink and brown bows in their hair and little toenails painted pink with pink flip-flops on. OMG they were so cute. The next set I saw today was 2 1/2 yr old boys. When I told the lady my son and wife were expecting twin boys her immediate response was "GOD BLESS HIM"!! She then said they were alot of fun but could "tear up a house in less than 30 seconds!" She appeared quite serious about that!!!Mmmmm Can hardly wait!!

The twins daddy also painted the nursery this week. Check it out.
Can you tell he is a graphic designer, not happy with solid color walls..had to make it his own design...a work in progress.

Two cribs and a changing table almost consume the entire room.

The next event will be "Baby Shower" coming Oct. 11---will post pictures when available.